A Few Good Men


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Pro-Wrestling Theatre invites The Hurricane  

to recreate Jack Nicholsonís uncontrolled rant to climax the movie A Few Good Men.  
Playing Tom Cruise's character will be the Pro Wrestling Torchís Wade Keller.

Pro-Wrestling Theatre Proudly Presents: "A Few Good Men"

The Hurricane: You want answers?

Wade Keller: I think I'm entitled to them.

The Hurricane: You want answers?!

Wade Keller: I want the truth!

The Hurricane: You can't handle the truth!

Wade, we live in a world that is dominated by ratings. And those ratings have to be popped by men with gimmicks. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Jason Powell?! 

I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for kayfabe and you curse the advent of Crash TV. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: That kayfabe's death, while tragic, probably brought about the boom period. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, pops the crowd.

You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about in Torch Takes, you want me in that gimmick. You need me in that gimmick.

We use words like ring rat, jobbing, gigging...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent working someone. You use them as a punch line to sell newsletters.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the entertainment that I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it. I'd prefer you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a mask and get in the ring. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to.

Wade Keller: (quietly) Did you date Nidia.

The Hurricane: I did the job Vince McMahon sent me to do.


The Hurricane: You're goddamn right I did!


Copyright © 2005 Derek Burgan. All rights reserved.